Best Jokes (continues)

There is to be a new Lottery for Cats. Apparently the star on the weekly draw programme on CatTV will be ...

Mystic Mog.

ATB from George

Soon the Canines will have a Lottery hosted by ...

Mystic Dog ...

Mystic Frog???

Mystic Hog???

This one has a big mileage left in it!

I like original humour!

ATB from G

Mystic sock???

Okay, that one stinks! 

ATB from George

[PS: Hot feet champion of the World].

This post should be OK......thats if Richard wakes up this morning in a jovial mood.

If Scotland gains its independence in the forthcoming referendum, the
remainder of the United Kingdom will be known as the "Former United
Kingdom" ....or FUK.

In a bid to discourage the Scots from voting 'yes' in the referendum,
The Government have now begun to campaign with the slogan "Vote NO, for
FUK's sake"

They feel the Scottish voters will be able to relate to this.

 

Have you got the photo that goes with this? Alex Salmond and the ''Lying Scotsman'' train?

Ryan Giggs today admitted to suffering from homesickness, saying that, even though he's happy in Manchester, he does Miss Wales occasionally.

Sorry no this is all i was sent by a friend of mine.

Can you oblige us with the photo JJb ?

Mista H

Try this link:

http://politicalscrapbook.net/...ying-scotsman-train/

Robin Williams' solicitor has been busy going through his files this morning. Apparently he is Good Will Hunting.

My thoughts go out to Gary Barlow and the rest of the band.

That is Gobbie Williams.

Robin Williams is the film star. He has just finished shooting ''Good Night Vietnam''.

Sorry to inform you Reg that it wasn't the talentless Robbie that has gone.  Big shame.

Besides if it had have been the talentless Robbie then Gary Barlow and the rest of the band would have been over the moon.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new...ic-feeling-skin.html

Apparently there has been no demand for a talking model

The video says that the new silicon doll is 10kg lighter than the previous model "making it easier to handle by seniors"... Not an image I wanted in my head this morning.....

Phil

The pump attendant who knows absolutely nothing about golf, greets him in a typical Irish manner completely unaware of who the golfing pro is.

" Top of the mornin' tooyer, sir" says the attendant.

Tiger nods a quick, 'hello' and bends forward to pick up the nozzle. As he does so, two tees fall out of his shirt pocket onto the ground.

" What be those?" asks the attendant..

" They're called tees," replies Tiger.

" Well, what on this God's earth are dey for?" inquires the Irishman.

" They're for resting my balls on when I'm driving," says Tiger.

" Fookin hell," says the Irishman, "Mercedes think of everything”.

 

That is very ageist.  Do they do those dolls in Dixons yet?

Fred you should be strung up for that last joke, it didn't strike a chord with me, had serious overtones and has created a riff in my family.