Best Jokes (continues)

The Olympic sailing results have just been announced. GB have taken gold, New Zealand have taken silver and Somalia have taken a middle aged couple from Dorset.

Apparently, all the 13 year old girls in London are peed off at the Olympics. All the A cup bras have disappeared since the competitors arrived......

Tony

The Somali Olympic squad has apologised as they had not realised that 'Shooting' and 'Sailing' are two separate events.

I see the Aussies aren't doing very well in the Olympics.

But then if they could run, they wouldn't have been Australians in the first place.

What's the difference between the New Zealand Rowing team and the entire Australian Olympic squad?

A man is walking thru the Olympic Village & sees someone carrying a long stick and asks,

“Are you a pole vaulter?”

“No,” says the man, “I am Cherman, but how did you know my name is Walter?”

Once upon a time, a girl asked a man to marry him. The girl said "No" and she lived happily ever after and went shopping, dancing and drinking. She always had a clean house, never cooked and looked fabulous all the time. The end.

Sixteen weeks ago a car hit me on a cycle.

You will have to explain the joke Tony. I am afraid I don't get it.

This is my knee on the operating table next day:

ATB from George

George. Are you on the right thread? I can't see any joke in your tragic accident.

I hope you're continuing to recover.

ATB

Steve

Dear Steve

I was commenting on the humourless post quoted, from Tony Lockhart. There is absolutely nothing funny about it in my experience and opinion. The point is that all too many people do see it as a joke.

Strange, in my view.

For myself, I am fortunately making good progress, though it still aches like mad from time to time!

ATB from George

For crying out loud!

Ok. From now on any joke, no, any post anywhere on this forum that might upset, insult or mildly annoy any living person on planet earth will be reported by me to Richard. Or I might even report it to the police. 

Does anyone disagree? If so, report this post. Easy.

Tony

Mike's joke earlier today. Insulting to men. Reported. 

An Australian friend was upset when I repeated some of the Olympic jokes posted here. All reported. 

12 minutes ago

 

 

Does that mean you are leaving the building?

Tony,

I don't get Mike's joke. Why would the girl say 'No' when she was asking the man to marry her? So it's not sexist it's really just gobbledegook.

Steve

Wow! For once I get to witness live the implosion of a thread before it gets canned by Richard!

Excellent!

Seriously guys, either grow up or sober up, whichever happens first....

Phil

May I suggest a truce? I doubt Tony had any intention of being insensitive to your condition George.  Hoy and Redgrave should be insulted but we can only wonder. You are both intelligent beings and should sort this out accordlingly or I'll have to come around and sort you both out!

KR

Tony

As I'm an unpaid carer, that's wide of the mark, whether you mean emotionally or any other sort of caring. 

I just don't care much for over-sensitive men that jump straight in with insults. Strange as you're such an eloquent person. 

Tony

Tony, I'm not that sort of man!

I know.

Chill out

Tony

George,

I don't think Tony's joke was aimed at you or aimed at cyclists in general or in particular.  What happened to you (and many others every day) was no joke, but if Tony's joke is the wrong side of the line then we may as well ban most of the jokes here.  Apart from that, it's all been discussed before and this thread will remain moderated as judiciously as possible.

You may not appreciate the joke, but it doesn't warrant your (moderated) post. 

Anyway, some posts pruned.  Carry on...