girlfriends & wives ...

dont see what its got to do with her if you dont even live together.........suggest you dump her n get more hi-fi.
scotty

It seems that you have two alternatives:

1. Stop lying.

2. Change your girlfriend.

Bob

quote:

Originally posted by ricardo953:
hi, prob been up on here before but he we go ....

I seem to lie about the hifi gear i bring home ie my proac tr8 sigs in burr oak cost £400!....

she hit the roof!..we don't even live together but every time she comes over she notices new kit .... :-)

So...if the girlfriend gave you stick about the price,...... what do you think your wife is gunna say.....?

3. or lie more convincingly?

Dump her and get one who's really into music, problem solved!

quote:

seem to lie about the hifi gear i bring home ie my proac tr8 sigs in burr oak cost £400!.

Why did you tell her it cost twice as much as it did - are you trying to impress?

Trade them for some of these if you really want to impress

no the tr8s cost around £800!....anyway i get into trouble coz we dont go on holidays quite as often as the money gets spent on music and hifi gear :-)

cant imagine what it would be like if we shared a place......it would have to have two wings and many rooms to hide stuff in hahaha

No need to lie - just be a bit more creative when it comes to justifying your purchase.

"I thought the old speakers/boxes were a poor match for our décor dear..."

"I bought those especially for you because I realise you're a person of great discernment and only the best will do for you my darling..."

"I was really taken by them because the colour matched your eyes..."

"I was lucky to be able to pick these up - they're an appreciating asset and in a few years they'll probably be worth enough to take you on a super holiday..."

Take the lazy way and stop lying. It saves having to remember the made-up details. If she doesn't like it, tough, find her replacement.
Ken

Stop using her credit card?

Things will get better when you go up the ladder; lots of Naim kit looks the same - so she'll never know - the above is on the Naim site under NAC 252 pre-amplifier (http://www.naim-audio.com/products/nac252.html), but the name of the picture file is NAC552.jpg when you click the picture of the 252 on the right hand side. If Naim can't spot the difference then she'll be none the wiser

It seems that your girlfriend is less understanding than your wife. So what is the point of her?
Stick to your wife or get another girlfriend.
Hans

I had a similar situation with my "other half" a while back - oddly enough it was sparked off by a camera, rather than my usual hi-fi purchases. She kept going on about how expensive it was, & did I really need it, & she how had a much cheaper spare one I could borrow. She wasn't going to let it go, & it felt like the early stages of "now you're in a relationship with me you have to spend your money the way I want". Finally she made one comment too many & I started "our first row" (aaah!).

It was no slanging match, but basically I told her I'd been after the item in question for ages, planning / comparing specs etc., I'd saved up the money, I could afford it, I wasn't getting into debt, & that was the sort of thing I wanted to do with my money. I still loved her, still wanted to go on holidays together etc., so it wasn't "me me me", but I am "into" Hi Fi / AV / Cameras etc. etc., & that wasn't about to change. I certainly didn't want to split up over it, & I understand the need to compromise in a relationship, but fundamentally if she couldn't accept me as I was, then really we had nowhere to go.

After that she confessed she'd been worried I'd been spending out of control. She'd not appreciated that I'd been planning it for so long, didn't know about my savings & was feeling that I might be making random "gadget" purchases to feed some kind of growing shopping addiction.

Now that I've addressed her fears, she's been much more supportive of my purchases - totally behind my decision to buy the Fraim for example, & even suggesting I get some more so I can split to two stacks.

If you're serious about her, I'd really recommend you have a similar chat - not confrontational, just open & honest. Tell her your hi fi & music are important to you and are part of your life, but so is she, & there's plenty of room for both.

Hope it works out for you.

J

mmmmm not married...

the hifi is a problem but I rede a motorcycle too!.....ehehehe

In my house we have the "luxury tax" system in place. This means whatever I spend on hifi she gets to spend the same amount on whatever it is women waste their $ on. So now I only have to lie about the amount I paid for something. "honey, I bought this used, it was only $200..."

I must be the luckiest man alive, my girlfriend paid for my last two lots of speaker cable!

Luckier than most at the very least.

quote:

Originally posted by tonym:
No need to lie - just be a bit more creative when it comes to justifying your purchase.

"I thought the old speakers/boxes were a poor match for our décor dear..."

"I bought those especially for you because I realise you're a person of great discernment and only the best will do for you my darling..."

"I was really taken by them because the colour matched your eyes..."

"I was lucky to be able to pick these up - they're an appreciating asset and in a few years they'll probably be worth enough to take you on a super holiday..."

There speaks the master...

If it works to sit the gal down and explain to her the details of your research and budgeting system, as previously suggested, then that's great -- but if it doesn't work it will actually make things worse. Pardon my contrarian bent in this post, but I don't actually think that much disclosure is a good idea: it gives away too much authority for you to be justifying things to that extent, and if you give her enough time she'll think of counters. What this argument is actually *about*, it seems to me, isn't money but authority. This is something you like, that she isn't in on, and she's threatened by that.

If I were you, I wouldn't dump her or justify myself either one: I'd say, "I have this hobby that I know a great deal about and enjoy, and I'm sure there are things like that for you, too, that I wouldn't begin to understand. That's what makes us such a great couple: we're so different."

If she persists, offer to take up a second hobby that you can pursue together. (In my case, hiking was perfect in this regard, by the way.)

But I strongly if respectfully disagree that the thing to do is sit down with a tote-board showing how long you've been looking into the purchase and how you've independently worked out how to pay for it -- our friend with the camera may be in for a bit of a surprise when he tries that approach the *SECOND* time....

quote:

If Naim can't spot the difference then she'll be none the wiser

Don't count on this one! Wives/girlfriends have a great talent of seeing things...

Arye

yep, the layer of polish they've put on it will have disappeared!

quote:

Originally posted by ROTF:
Things will get better when you go up the ladder; lots of Naim kit looks the same - so she'll never know - the above is on the Naim site under NAC 252 pre-amplifier.

Quite true. Naim gear has always looked pretty much the same at different generations. My wife (pretty observant), hasn't noticed much with respect to how I've added and swapped CB gear over the years. All she knows is that they seem to multiply like rabbits. I tell her the junk is 20 years old - she infers it must not be worth much.

Girlfriends - don't you get a home trial and see if they sound right in your room first?

Wives - sometimes you just have to upgrade, even it means trading in your beloved chrome bumper 250...

(Don't think I'll let the wife read this thread, somehow)

Damn. I thought this was going to be a pictures thread!!

Don't think I'd get away with that, she doesn't think herself very photogenic.

I disagree, she's just shy.

Why are the only women who seem comfortable with the way they look the fat and hideous ones that insist on wearing next to nothing in Aberdeen on a Friday night when the temp is sub zero?

Before anyone whose girlfriend or sister goes out on a Friday night in Aberdeen finds and murders me, I'm only complaining about the fat and ugly ones, so if you're offended you're conceding that your gf/sister is fat and ugly!