Latest sniffpetrol.com.

Posted by: Tony Lockhart on 12 October 2005

What a great site. Here's one extract:

AMERICA IN GAS DISASTER
As American gas prices sky rocket in the wake of Hurricane Katrina and the sterling leadership of a president who continues to pursue a military campaign against irrational religious-led violence because God told him to, reports are now reaching the international media of the horrifying steps some US citizens have been forced to take in order to keep mobile. Alarm bells were first set ringing by first hand reports of at least one man on the West Coast deciding to order a brand new Dodge Thrustfucker with a 5.7-litre engine, rather than the premium package 7.8-litre V8. However, this soon proved to be just the start of a series of measures that many desperate Americans are taking as the gas crisis takes hold. Several major US cities have reported multiple cases of drivers electing not to use their cars at all, even on long journeys such as from the donut store to the Starbucks at the other end of the block. Experts say such occurrences can only mean one thing; that the gas price situation has hit so hard, some Americans may even have taken to the last resort of 'walking'. "I saw this guy yesterday, he was moving along the street but he didn't have a car," said one shocked eye witness. "He was kind of moving his legs systematically, one after the other to achieve some sort of forward motion. I can't say how, but it sure looked like he was doing this without burning any gas whatsoever. May God have mercy on us all".
As the US gas crisis deepens and with no end in sight as yet, many Americans are now turning to their President to take action, hopefully by firing some missiles at A-rabs.

There's also a great paragraph about Jenson Button:

http://www.sniffpetrol.com/

Tony
Posted on: 12 October 2005 by Traveling Dan
I’ve been visiting this site for some time now and I recommend it as very good for putting a smile on one’s face.

It’s well worth spending some time in the archive as well – but be warned that it could lead to the occasional coffee/keyboard moment. One that particularly springs to mind was a feature about BMW introducing the new feature “bellendtronic”.

And I am a big fan of Carcoat Damphands, the used car expert with a unique grasp of slang and jargon:

“Stuff my nudgers, it's Helmut outside and that means placing is dirty. Even so, a firm Gary came into the hammock the other day, licking the gristle on a study Greek. Wrestled a bear, held my legs, drenched in cheese. Punched my gran for a lazlo under six geese. Minty.”