Cost of raising children

In Canada, more and more couples are paying for their own weddings with help from their parents.

We do start saving for their education (i.e. university) from the day they are born !

Chaps

I would have thought than any man with a sense of pride would pay for his daughters wedding. If you don't then frankly you have failed in your obligations of fatherhood.

Regards

Mick

Just paid for a daughter's wedding.

One down, one to go :-)

quote:

Originally posted by Mick Parry:
Chaps

I would have thought than any man with a sense of pride would pay for his daughters wedding. If you don't then frankly you have failed in your obligations of fatherhood.

Regards

Mick

This is a cultural thing Mick, some might think you are a bad father if you don't pay a dowri.

If it were my daughter, I'd pay half of the cost of the reception, with the groom's parents paying the other half, and we'd buy the wedding dress.

But the reason why parents are not being asked to pay for the whole wedding these days is because of control. Parents who pay want the control, sensible brides who want the control pay for the wedding with their grooms.

heck, I got married just over a year ago, I paid for 80%, my bride payed 20%. My parents-in-law were never in any position to pay for her wedding. In any case it was her second, my first.

I also have seen how bad a start to the relationship between the larger families can get when it comes to who's paying for what. Sometimes it's just best to keep it simple and pay for it yourself.

Maybe it's different in the States since the cost of college comes out of the parents' pockets. That's as much as I can afford if I ever want to retire (which, more and more, comes out of our pockets).

A couple who can't afford their own wedding is a couple that can't afford to be married. They should get a little older and more established, at which point the limos, the $10,000 dress and the bachelor party in Vegas might not look like necessities.

quote:

Originally posted by JRHardee:
Maybe it's different in the States since the cost of college comes out of the parents' pockets. That's as much as I can afford if I ever want to retire (which, more and more, comes out of our pockets).

A couple who can't afford their own wedding is a couple that can't afford to be married. They should get a little older and more established, at which point the limos, the $10,000 dress and the bachelor party in Vegas might not look like necessities.

Agreed !

I married at 41, our wedding cost us $22,000 and we were deliberately trying to keep the cost down. Now in many cases you break even with gifts, ours didn't we covered 1/5th.

Also, you'll see people having many bridal showers and fund-raising events to raise the cash for a wedding.

My father in law paid for lavish weddings for his first two daughters (now both divorced). Didn't seem fair that approaching a modest retirement he should have to fork out for another.
Mrs Willy designed her own dress and had it made at her own expense. i dusted off an existing suit (ok so it was Armani but I bought it in a sale). Wedding was a Register office one. After that we went to a photographers studio for some photos of just the two of us. For the Reception we booked exclusive use of the best restaurant in her home town (only a couple of dozen relatives and close friends).It was a really good restaurant and was by far the best wedding food I've ever had. Excellent atmosphere, just like a good night out with your mates and the Mother in law paid the bar bill! Honeymoon in Paris. All in under £2k.

I keep telling my daughter how wonderful it was......

Willy.

Sounds good Willy ... our reception cost $8,000 for 80 or so guests ... each person without fail said that this was the best wedding food they'd ever had in recent memory. We also made sure we had a great DJ.

I gave my girls £30,000 each. Neither of them spent more than £6000 on the wedding! It was amazing how much the thought of keeping most of it for themselves focussed their minds!

Both were Registry Office ceremonies (bride and groom in each case atheist).

Marisa and her husband hired a Village Hall for the reception. Relatives recruited to help prepare it (and clean up the morning after), Wine etc bought wholesale (trade contacts), Cold buffet professionally supplied along with hired plates/glasses. Entertainment courtesy of future brother-in-law (an amateur DJ) and his wife who did a brilliant job of "calling" for the Square Dances. Professional photographer. Wedding video done by me, my brother and groom's father

Rowena had a slightly more elaborate affair, albeit with some additional financial support from groom's parents. Hired a large hall in Wandsworth, catered cold buffet, wine/spirits as for Marisa. Decorations again courtesy of family/friends. Entertainment? A Ceilidh band (sp?). They also hired an old London double-decker bus to transport the guests from the wedding in Merton to the reception.

The strangest part was that SWMBO and I stayed overnight at a pub in Wandsworth, and the morning after I looked out of the window and recognised the council flats where I lived from 4-8 years old. Memory's a funny thing - I always thought it was a long walk down to the area of the Ram Brewery, but it was only about 200 yards!

quote:

In Canada, more and more couples are paying for their own weddings with help from their parents.

We do start saving for their education (i.e. university) from the day they are born !

I know! I have a sister in Edmonton (+husband and 3 children)

I just wonder whether I ought to start saving now to help finance my grandkids' further education (they're only 2 ATM)

quote:

Ceilidh

My best man's wedding had one of these, it was soooo much fun. The band were excellent as was the caller.

quote:

quote:
Ceilidh


My best man's wedding had one of these, it was soooo much fun. The band were excellent as was the caller.

I enjoyed it too, although my dancing was limited by my angina. I did try to show SWMBO my "note from my mum excusing me from dancing", but she refused to acknowledge it, saying I'd been trying that trick ever since our honeymoon, and she'd NEVER EVER seen that note.
Bit of a cheek, as I'd persuaded mum to write one for me earlier that evening!

With so many marraiges ending in divorce is it really prudent to lavish horrendous sums of money on them ? How many here have been to wedding ceremonies of people who a year later are going through the divorce courts? Perhaps I'm just unlucky but of the last three I have been to only one couple survived a year together. That's a combined wedding cost of somewhere over £100,000 !
Off to another this weekend. Here's hoping.

I'm saving up to pay for my wife's divorce solicitor, way to go yet.

The cost of raising children?

Almost as much as some people's hifi systems...