Help me design the worlds worst VFM system
Posted by: Minky on 21 March 2004
The scenario
You go the doctor and he says "Mate, it seems dat on your recent trip up de Congo you contracted an extremely rare tropical disease. In approximately six months you will spontanehously explode. Sorry."
Besides being already moderately well healed, your life is insured for "buckets" and the policy pays out in advance for terminal conditions.
This is a complicated situation because on the one hand you are now wealthy beyond your wildest dreams but on the other hand you have bugger all time to enjoy it, if indeed any form of "enjoyment" is possible with the big bang just round the corner. To add insult to injury you have never really loved your "loved ones" and they are already starting to circle like vultures.
The plan
Then it hits you. A plan that will give you hours of fun AND, if executed professionally, send your pig-like family to the poor house where they belong, the bastards.
The idea is this : purchase the worlds most expensive crap hi-fi. Why ? because :
1) The quest will drive you quickly and efficiently to bankruptcy.
2) The quest to spend the MOST on the WORST will be a hell of a laugh.
3) No one will be any the wiser until it's too late. Let's face it - bugger all of your civilian next-door neighbors suspect that your "nice sounding" system has cost you more than the GDP of Afghanistan.
4) Post detonation the gear will be worth about as much as your smoking remains.
The question
The question is this : What LP/CD/preamp/power amp(s)/speakers will hoover up the most cash, give the worst possible results and be totally worthless on the second-hand market ?
You go the doctor and he says "Mate, it seems dat on your recent trip up de Congo you contracted an extremely rare tropical disease. In approximately six months you will spontanehously explode. Sorry."
Besides being already moderately well healed, your life is insured for "buckets" and the policy pays out in advance for terminal conditions.
This is a complicated situation because on the one hand you are now wealthy beyond your wildest dreams but on the other hand you have bugger all time to enjoy it, if indeed any form of "enjoyment" is possible with the big bang just round the corner. To add insult to injury you have never really loved your "loved ones" and they are already starting to circle like vultures.
The plan
Then it hits you. A plan that will give you hours of fun AND, if executed professionally, send your pig-like family to the poor house where they belong, the bastards.
The idea is this : purchase the worlds most expensive crap hi-fi. Why ? because :
1) The quest will drive you quickly and efficiently to bankruptcy.
2) The quest to spend the MOST on the WORST will be a hell of a laugh.
3) No one will be any the wiser until it's too late. Let's face it - bugger all of your civilian next-door neighbors suspect that your "nice sounding" system has cost you more than the GDP of Afghanistan.
4) Post detonation the gear will be worth about as much as your smoking remains.
The question
The question is this : What LP/CD/preamp/power amp(s)/speakers will hoover up the most cash, give the worst possible results and be totally worthless on the second-hand market ?
Joe, I just laughed so hard I sh*t my p*nts. This is exactly what I was after 
Will this lot definitely sound bad ? Surely this needs to be debated on the hi-fi forum ?
Will this lot definitely sound bad ? Surely this needs to be debated on the hi-fi forum ?