Killer Couplets
Posted by: Bruce Woodhouse on 09 October 2001
Listening to some Billy Bragg last night, two great lines made me chuckle as ever
"How can you lie there and think of England
When you don't even know who's in the team?"
(from 'Greetings to the New Brunette')
and
"Heavens above,
can this sticky stuff really be love?"
(from 'Moving The Goalposts')
anyone care to suggest the lines from songs which always make them laugh?
Bruce
Posted on: 09 October 2001 by woodface
Stay with Me by The Faces is the most outrageously funny/offensive (delete as appropriate) song I can think of. 'She says her name is Rita and her perfume sure smells sweeter' is as close to genius as pop music gets! The whole attitude of the song makes you wonder how Rod managed to keep a straight face.
Posted on: 09 October 2001 by glenda
"I like it here - can I stay ?
And do you have a vacancy for a backscrubber?"
- Half A Person .
Always gives me a laugh when I hear it .
Posted on: 11 October 2001 by Colin Lorenson
"All I ask of you
is make my wildest dreams come true"
wonderful - and not toooooooo much to want.
Colin Lorenson
Posted on: 11 October 2001 by Pete
There are just so many good ones from both, though I think my favourite has to be from "Teenage Lobotomy" by the Ramones:
"Now I guess I'll have to tell 'em
I ain't got no cerebellum"
Pete.
Posted on: 11 October 2001 by von zipper
Bob always raises a wry smile,but my favourite line has to be
'The sun aint yellow-It's chicken!
Posted on: 11 October 2001 by von zipper
'He thinks that I'm a cabbage,cos I hate university Challenge'
Sheer Fergal genius!
Posted on: 11 October 2001 by Matt Gear
"let me get my hands
on your mammary glands"
from 'you handsome devil' is a cracker
also kate bush's:
"Beelzebub is aching in my belly-o.
My feet are heavy and I'm rooted in my wellios"
is always good for a chuckle.
cheers
matt
Posted on: 11 October 2001 by Pete
quote:
Originally posted by von zipper:
'He thinks that I'm a cabbage,cos I hate university Challenge'
or indeed, "He always beat me at Subbuteo/'cause he flicked to kick, but I didn't know" or "His Ma bought him a synthesizer/got the Human League in to advise him".
What a great song, must pull out the relevant black circle sometime this evening...
Pete.
Posted on: 11 October 2001 by glenda
I'm listening to John Peel's celebration of 40 years in the biz and the boy Bragg is on . How about :
"I've had relations
With girls of many nations "
Or , non rhyming couplet -
" I am the milkman of human kindness
I wil leave an extra pint"
p.s. If you are on this forum , turn Peely on NOW!!!!
Posted on: 11 October 2001 by John C
He's got a fur lined sheep skin jacket
My Ma says they cost a packet!
John
Posted on: 11 October 2001 by JohnS
But Robbie Williams "Forever Texas" lines:
I'm so superstitious,
So there's something you should know,
The reason I'm doing you is,
'Cause your friend said 'no'.
Always makes me laugh.
Also John Cooper Clarke's (the Bard of Salford) haiku:
Writing a poem
In seventeen syllables
Is very diffic
In fact the great JCC has much humor in his work. He is a bit fringe for most people though.
-John
Posted on: 11 October 2001 by Lo Fi Si
What kind of creature bore you
Was it some kind of bat
They can't find a good word for you
But I can ...
JCC
Brilliant! get his anthology "10 years in an open neck shirt"
Saw him supporting New Order in 1980 (in NZ). One of the best concerts I've been to.
Simon
Posted on: 12 October 2001 by Pete, Mad Bad and Dangerous to Know
She took me to her bedroom to show me her computer.
She asked me if I liked it, I said she was cuter
Was (not Was)
pete MB&D
Posted on: 12 October 2001 by matthewr
My favourite Billy Bragg line is:
"In the end it took me a dictionary
To find out the meaning of unrequited.
And all the time she was giving herself for free
At a party to which I was never invited"
Other favourite lyrics in a vaguely rhyming couplet style:
"Tedious people, tiresome town
Under the gaze of a mayoral frown
All is quiet with a gentle breeze
Tarkus on black vinyl please"
"When I had my loft
Converted back into a loft
The neighbours came around and scoffed
And called me retro"
"She's the main man in the office in the city
And she treats me like I'm just another lackey
But I can put a tennis racket up against my face
And pretend that I am Kendo Nagasaki"
Matthew
Posted on: 12 October 2001 by JohnS
I lent someone my copy of "10 years in an open-necked shirt" and of course have never seen it again. Bah.
he makes love like a footballer,
he dribbles before he shoots
I've seen how democracy is under duress,
But I've never seen a nipple in the daily express
I wanna be your setting lotion,
hold your hair in deep devotion
Check out http://www.cyberspike.com/clarke/
Posted on: 21 October 2001 by Andy Kirby
Billy Brag and Loudon Wainwright III from JP sessions.
"Between Marx and Marzipan,
in the dictionary,
there is Mary.
Between the deep blue sea,
and the Devil,
there is me."
BB
'I wish I was a lesbian and not a hetero,
I wouldn't have to mess with men and all their come and go'
'And all that facial hair',
'And yucky machismo.'
LWIII
Cheers
Andy 
