President Bush Soon To Resign:

Fredders, I recall many American servicemen cleaning up on all sorts of bargains big-style that they'd bought in East Berlin at the time (Dresden China at a snippet for instance), as (Unlike) the British they were allowed to go there with pockets full of East German dosh exchanged here in West Berlin at amazingly low exchange rates. My long afore Fiance's old man, used to often take his car to Germany via ship from Oslo to fill up on expensive electrical goods, like TV's for instance, and risk getting them back, sometimes it still paid off to actually pay ther duty (though he was an engineer, so was probably slightly mad anyway).

I had a few very expensive evenings in Andys Pub too (National Theatre restaurant too), as well as knowing how popular my own BOOZE from London was, and whils't the Norwegians are larging it daily in Denmark, the Danes are larging it daily in Germany, for exactly the same reason; (Scandinavians and alcohol don't mix generally in my experience) very extreme.

I was interested yesterday listening to a French Senator explaining to the BBC how calm and dicplined French police are in general, so I expect the scenes shown shortly afterwards were instigated by Journo's then? What with the British Police being the 'Impartial' Servants of the Public, you'd think they'd work a bit quicker these days at bringing charges (or not) wouldn't you? instead of being politicians themselves, I suppose it must be all those new fangled hi-tech super expensive tax payer financed toys designed to speed things up in the 21st Century they play with, eh! (14 Days max in IRA etc, days), and it seemingly sufficed!


My Turkish friend recently asked the British Embassy here on advice regarding buying property in London for his daughter, who's soon to study there at the LSE, they indirectly told him to fuck orf, so that's allright then, innit

About 30-50 spoilt brat Yanky rich kids die in Cancoon, Mexico each year, after running riot causing havoc in hotels, etc, getting legless on CHEAP BOOZE, and falling off of balcony's etc, etc, aaagh; How Sad

I see the compassionate Yanks are very interested in Niger these days I wonder why?

Interesting yesterday to see the Chief of the German Military Staff, laying a wreath to Commemorate the fallen in the first World War. Potsdam, near Berlin has an ancient Jewish Cemetary (where this Ceremony took place), and strangely enough even the nasty's left it alone? Mendellson Bartholdy's grave was recently badly damaged by idiots here in the City, but I think that was mainly through sheer mindless-drunken-doped-up-boredome like the car burnings by kids in France at present, for a bit of excitement & kicks, as per usual saturday night, Man, wunnit


Nice to see that Two Ronnies text again, it's only two months or so since it was last on here, bloody repeats on British Internet Forums, eh! nearly as good as the telly itself I fear


Cancun, naturally :

I expect when the British public begin to have confidence in the Police for solving basic domestic crime more efficiently, they'll start to think more seriously about other diversions to the fact, or is this negative fantasy?

The new 'State of the Art' German Biometric, etc, Passports came into service last week (that means they're not still actually talking about it, or arguing about costs etc, etc, they're actually now being bought and used by members of the German public). Each one costs a reasonable (10 Year validity) €59, and seem to be working fine so far.

I wonder when the super-expensive British fuck up eventually comes about, and terrorist are allowed to slip through, who'll get the blame? The Germans probably, innit!


You know me, I ain't ain't sayin nuffin, what with the World Cup soon coming up and all, perhaps people should maybe ask their friendly British Embassy for Citizens advice, afterall, just like the Police, that's what they're there for, supposedly! innit

Now that England's in €urope


I hope all these made up porkies are not too Negative for yawl?

Could the Honourable member who recently had that nice parking-ticket fine revoked, please let us know if he's actually recieved the dosh in his bank account yet, that being the proof of the pudding so to speak, innit?


My Mothers new phone connenction (Promised for today) is surprisingly enough, not working yet either, BT teabreak I expect?

quote:

Originally posted by Berlin Fritz:

"Hey Teacher! leave us kids alone"

Pavlov's dog or mere puppet Phritz?
I see you've exchanged negativity for trivia.
Or is it the other way round?

Nime me old Banana skin, As a Dane I expect you have a 'Special' sense of humour anyway; but when you discuss an impotent subject, and refer to 'education' (or lack of it for French kids with brown skin, etc), then actually spell immigration wrongly straight afterwards, I don't find it funny actually, and don't put it into the normal 'everybody makes mistakes 'even Fritz' on this forum cos they can't be arsed taking more time. As one can also larf orf the recent Honourable Member who kindly & proudly informed everybody that he was a Cambridge Graduate, and was actually discussing his own given subject, but couldn't spell Scientist in his very first sentence correctly, perhaps he's a teacher as well?


You should know by now that I mean nothing personally on here, and have no agenda, but do find your latest jump into this thread that you purport to despise so much, very positive indeed Clive, innit

Beggin Yer Umble as always:

Fritz von Englishman in Berlin:

When one considers that the wonderful traditional British Fish & Chip shop on the proverbial street corner has been around for well over a Century now, but alas requires a decent sized mortgage (with or without endowment) acquired through a 'strictly kosher' IFA naturally, to actually be able to afford to purchase a medium-sized property (sorry, I mean portion of their fine wares) it's lucky that we didn't go and kick the original purveyers of the stuff out of the land, and back to their native Greece, wunnit

So when one thinks of all the kebab and Arab nosebag shops around that are always doing very nicely thank you (not to mention Ruby houses) employing their own, and contributing lots of lovely taxes for the Crafty Chancellor(s), it's no wonder the old pork pie is dying a slow death, issit

"Apparently Turkish Chicken Farms are going Cheep lately!"

for poultry sums even!


I ain't sayin Nuffin though

"Yes your Honour, I did actually think to myself at the time!" "Isn't it about time that somebody started a thread on the old Padded Cell internet forum regarding strictly enforcing 30 mile an hour speed limits in highly built up inner city zones, and child friendly areas"

I don't think the good old Green Goddesses can go much faster than that anyhow?

Phritz

My spelling is going to pieces lately as is my memory. Can one become dyslexic with advancing age? I don't even recognise whether some words are spelt correctly any more. Too many severe blows to the head probably. I fell backwards off the roof onto an area of concrete only a few years ago. Blood everywhere. Umpteen stitches. Doctor said it was lucky I landed on my head or I might have been badly hurt. Trouble is I'd heard that one before. More than once unfortunately.

Nime von englander i Danmark.

Those who deem it fit never served on the Isle of Wight, so I ain't sayin nuffink

quote:

Originally posted by AndyFelin:
Thanks Dan, names and addresses noted.

Andy

What colour ink did you use, or was it a pencil, and are you perhaps left handed?

My mate's off to Guatalmala tommorow for three months, I don't know if he wants to buy any property there though, but if anybody's interested in investing lots of wisely-spent dosh, just say the word, and I'll get onto some reputable people for you, Honnist, innit


Apparently Our Mick's bought his way back into the UK by the back door, the people they let in these days is bloody disgraceful, innit !

'Brasso's all round chaps, I'm back, sod it I've forgotten me wallet, lend me a score till tuesday Our Adam, there's a lad'


Our Adders thinking!'I wonder what tuesday that'll be then?'

Nice to see the new 'Speeding on the M4 in Wiltshire' thread coming along nicely 'again', just think, er, 4 million folk regularly drive in UK totally illegally, but you know me, I ain't saying sod all!

Swiss property investors will be very welcome in Istanbul tommorow

quote:

Originally posted by Phil-1978:
JamieWednesday - great idea.
If enough people start doing this then we'll be contributing to the economy, keeping Royal Mail staff in their jobs and possibly creating even more jobs!

Remarkably Parryesque Phil, should we be told!

Knowing that many of you have been eagerly awaiting news of Fritz's Mum's telephone saga, I can happily say this, innit. Two separate phone lines (and numbers) put in as required (one day late, so requireing one person to stay home from work unexpectedly at their cost), both phones sitting next to each other in the same room, with no chance of getting one put into the other part of the house as was requested, as it wasn't on the 'engineers' chit, and he's not allowed to make obvious decisions. Both phones will now also have answer machines connected 5 days after originally stated, causing yet more unforseen business probs. A private person (non BT) will be brought in asap to extend a connection, at extra cost and more wasted time.


Now isn't that lovely customer service, just like British Banks, one big old fucking piss take²

quote:

Originally posted by Nime:
Phritz

My spelling is going to pieces lately as is my memory. Can one become dyslexic with advancing age? I don't even recognise whether some words are spelt correctly any more. Too many severe blows to the head probably. I fell backwards off the roof onto an area of concrete only a few years ago. Blood everywhere. Umpteen stitches. Doctor said it was lucky I landed on my head or I might have been badly hurt. Trouble is I'd heard that one before. More than once unfortunately.

Nime von englander i Danmark.

Nime, me old Pale Ale snifter, it's lucky you didn't land bonce first on your neighbours cat sleeping on the bonnet of the motor, wunnit

P.S. Good work on the police's part in catching the only bad bastard in Liverpool and hopefully resulting in a very long life sentence for the brave axe murder of a young decent lad on his way home in July, maybe they should send the c*** to a Yankee jail full of the very chaps he seemingly despises so badly!

As we've seen on the thread relating to road accidents etc, the sort of morons the cops have to put up with every day of the week are boundless


Don't forget yer Chavellers Cheques innit, great in Egypt I hear?

I was most surprised that Qatar Airways are starting a new twice daily service between Glasgow & Mallorca! and I expect it wont be long before the old John Lennon International gets in on the act too, 10 daily trips to the Alaskan Tundra (One Way Only), now wouldn't that be a nice idea if brought to full fruition, innit

"Wotta Abaat all dem Essex Birds Dyin Then?"


My Private Eye went astray in the post last week (1st time ever). E-mailed them yesterday, reply today, with nice letter, and a new one on the way pronto.


NOW THAT'S SERVICE, INNIT


Who'll be first with a 'beautiful Plumage' gag?

That's my cue!

A bird of prey caught a blackbird in the garden today after some remarkable aerobatics through the shrubbery. They crashed through the hedge and landed just a few feet away. I'm not sure who was more startled. It glared at me for a few second unsure what to do since it was obviously close to lunchtime. Then it did a vertical take off with the shrieking blackbird still in tow and disappeared over the hedge. Well that's one less bird to worry about. Poor devil.

Wake up Phritz! We have the latest revelations in Iraq to discuss!

I see that official British unemployment figures are up again for the 9th month running, with lazy bastard dole-scroungers nearly reaching the 1 million mark.! Perhaps they should introuduce the new German system there too, to get them off of their bloody arses, innit, that means (compulsory) £1,25 an hour, full time (minmum wage doesn't apply) plus your normal dole money (no other allowances though, including bus/train tickets, which must be self-financed)(9 month contracts):

Mind you with all the jobs that are going all the time in the UK (I see the ads regularly) it's amazing to me that anybody is out of work at all, let alone disabled folk, innit. Some folks are lucky enough to have three jobs to maintain a high standard of living that is so world renouned. I see inflation is also going up nicely, as with mega gas & lecktric bills (as they are here too) though I doubt if it'll affect too many on this forum, though that's naturally another matter, most of you are no doubt hard bloody working, hard playing professionals in your given fields, innit? I'll hopefully be having another job interview soon as well, but fortunately never having been a bread-head, money isn't my only God, issit.


Looking forward to the old PMQ's soon from the hoose, I wonder if those figures I've just mentioned above will be brought up at all, at all?


P.S. How is closing British pubs at 01:00hrs at weekends in future, on par with the 'Continent' then! we should be told?

N.B. I think that moaning minny businesse's that whinge about the government flooding the market with cheap dole labour (totally ignoring hard & long faught for minimum wages) should put up or shut up, don't they realise this is the Free Market, innit Our Mick

Mind if I repossess your house Sir?

I reckon I'll leave my Swiss Baseball cap at home tonight if I go out to get me a kebab, cos you can just smell it in the air, and I don't mean doner meat either


Do senior freemasons require planning permission?

One would imagine than once the financial reigns are finally tightened up, and hauled in, in the UK to sensibly halt private as well as govermental folk (Local & National) from getting ever increasingly into a no-return debt downward-spiral-situation, either through credit cards, Tesco deals, etc, and PFI on the larger tax payers bill, the 'industry' of 'unqualified' IFA's for instance, will surprise surprise virtually vanish overnight.

When people get caught out for the fist time on a clever 'Kosher looking' scam, wether it be a pyramid get rich quick scheme (Illegal in UK, but not here yet) or the three card/nutshell & pea trick in Oxford Street etc ( Nationwide), they hopefully learn their lesson! but seemingly as with many things in life, in actuality they don't (bit like gambling or repeating a hangover I suppose?). A Nationwide serious 'professional IFA Qualification' 'on par with others' would be a good sign, but there again, as we've all recently learnt in respect of being a good British Citizen, one doesn't ask a Lawyer for his/her credentials first, one asks how much they charge, innit


P.S. I wonder how many out there have read between the lines of Sir Ian Blair's latest statement regarding er, 'Police Transparency' then?

Chocolates? Maltesers!


Well done Australia, Great Stuff lads

Turkish Delight or Toblerone; That is the Question, innit John ?


I didn't know that you could smoke agent orange!
Mind you it was probably legal then, as lot's of things were in the last century AD, innit

Baroness Thatcher did once utter that undeniable truth that nuclear weapons cannot be diss-invented, and similarly so did The PM today in his reference to the Kyoto treaty, in that if India, China, and the US, don't sign up, we might as well all stand pissing against the wind forever, innit

"They shoot Grizzly's Don't they!"


My mate who's off to Guatamala today for three months, is taking some portable music with him in the guise of an iplod, as he's er, a copper, innee


Evenin All !