Lies, **** lies and staff surveys?

Posted by: Nime on 23 June 2005

Since being taken over by a multi-national we seem to have been burdened with staff satisfaction surveys every year.

This has previously involved 100% of the staff with no identifiable questionaire marking or "iffy" questions. So the claimed anonymity was probably satisfied.

But what happens when a tiny minority are handed questionaires by their immediate supervisors? The small number participating are now well known to all. Yet the private company handling the survey claims complete anonymity for those taking part!

But how can this be true? Those few participating openly admit they dare not give the company bad marks. Though they would really like to. This will obviously result in completely worthless answers and meaningless results. The survey papers asks for age, sex, time employed and are numbered.

This is an annual survey of many firms to produce a national pecking order of each company's employee satisfaction. The results will no doubt be widely published.

So, what would you do if you were handed a questionaire? Eek
Posted on: 23 June 2005 by Bob McC
What any self respecting cynic would do - answer every question "wrong"

Bob
Posted on: 23 June 2005 by Deane F
Nime

Have you seen "American Beauty" with Kevin Spacey?

Deane
Posted on: 23 June 2005 by garyi
Our company does the same thing. Only there are so many of us only some are picked.

Same old shit.
Posted on: 24 June 2005 by Nime
quote:
Originally posted by Deane F:
Nime

Have you seen "American Beauty" with Kevin Spacey?

Deane


It was some time ago.......? Confused

What I cannot understand with these small sample surveys is why anyone would recognise their dodgy findings. If those participating openly admit they are going to lie to protect themselves and their jobs....then what the hell is the point of bothering doing the survey at all?

All that can be realistically measured by such a survey is the width of the whitewash brush!
Posted on: 24 June 2005 by Lomo
A fact of life, Nime.
Companies pay to conduct surveys. Then they put them in the wastepaper basket.
I wouldn't worry, as someone said ,publish and be damned.
Posted on: 24 June 2005 by Berlin Fritz
The BBC are World Champions, innit Cool
Posted on: 24 June 2005 by Nime
quote:
Originally posted by Berlin Fritz:
The BBC are World Champions, innit Cool


So, you're a statistician as well Phritz?
Or is that a weighted question?
Posted on: 24 June 2005 by Berlin Fritz
It's been well publicised and documented in the press I happen to peruse that Auntie Beeb as well as driving its staff nuts with bloody stupid endless questionaire's of late, 'Loyalty proof etc' , it's also fairly widely accepted that a certain Female Minister is effectively at its helm, and steers it wherever the dear leader wishes it to be steered, just like the B-Twins, and the dirty digger really, obvious, innit.

Fritz Von Crunching numbers for Nime innee Big Grin
Posted on: 24 June 2005 by Nime
That'll explain the swift departure of Ms Piper ad Big Ears then? Failed a loyalty survey and were asked to leave quietly? Eek

Didn't have you down as a Sun reader given the likely local price in Tyskland? Wot with you bein' on your flippin' uppers'n'all, innit?
Posted on: 24 June 2005 by Berlin Fritz
I'm a Daily Sport Man old Chap where the real Truth lies.

Fritz Von LIverpool going Welsh wotta lark eh ? Big Grin
Posted on: 24 June 2005 by Nime
quote:
Originally posted by Berlin Fritz:
I'm a Daily Sport Man old Chap where the real Truth lies.


Do they have real writing in that one or is it all air-heads, balloons and bubbles?
Posted on: 24 June 2005 by Berlin Fritz
It reported yesterday that after our Tony's imminent resignation, Gordon's sulking awaa, and our Jack's interim stability period, a first Labour Lady will appear, and be PM.


Fritz Von & The spiders from Mars, he played with left hand **** Razz
Posted on: 24 June 2005 by Phil Barry
Glimpses of IBM's 'employee sat' survey in 1981. I was NOT happy with my supervisor. My team was about 8 people.

Supervisor discusses the results withthe team and reports an anomaly: low average sat with the supervisor, but everybody reported they felt IBM was better than most other companies. IIRC, nobody could explain, so I said the explanation was that all other companies were thought to be lousy overall but we thought the supervisor could be better than she was.

It turned out that 7 employees gave her average scores; 1 gave her the lowest scores, and that 1 employee brought the average sat down...and unwittingly I identified myself pretty clearly....

I got better responses from her after the meeting.

Glimpse of survey in 1982:

I had so many complaints that I brought in a list, so I wouldn't forget - but I couldn't figure out how to refer to the list without identifying myself as a complainer.

I got into the room with about a dozen fellow employees. The manager passed out the forms and told us to start. Even before he left the room, 2 senior guys reached into their pockets and pulled out several sheets of notes, so I didn't worry about using my notes.

I left IBM before I heard the results...but one of the guys said he wrote that he felt sorry for the people who worked for my supervisor, and she was removed shortly after the surveys were done.

The surveys aren't all bad.

Phil
Posted on: 24 June 2005 by Berlin Fritz
Apparently one of Mugagbe's wallers supplied IBUM with the questionaire's and subsequent advice and actions to be taken as a result, innit, or was it Blair ? Cool
Posted on: 24 June 2005 by Derek Wright
Another story from the great TLA - when it was making a decent profit and gave decent pay rises - it ran Employee Sat Surveys - when the first of the many culls arrived Employee Sat Surveys kind of disappeared.

A certain group in the UK were very committed to the product, their job but were unimpressed with"their masters" on the left sde of the pond - so they rated down the senior levels, - this was shortly followed by the arrival of a "tourist from the left hand side" who's mission in life was to split up and dissipate the "anarchic" group. Their greatest crime being to say how it was.
Posted on: 24 June 2005 by Berlin Fritz
I wonder how long Sir Alex will keep quiet ? Big Grin