From the Sydney Morning Herald...

Posted by: JamieWednesday on 29 June 2006

...in the letters page a couple of days ago.

Just wanted to drop you all a note of condolence on your World Cup exit. Although you were never really good enough to be there in the first place, as one of our foreign outposts we think you did quite well and, most importantly, represented your Queen admirably. So, well done, little colony.

On the upside though, now at least your long-haired, scruffy, unclean teenage masses can all return to London to resume their minimum wage jobs, serving us thirsty English boys warm beer, just in time for the games on Friday and Saturday. Good timing, really, because as everyone agrees, the real tournament starts now that only the real footballing teams are left.

Well, chin up, anyway, pickpockets, and I suppose it's back to stealing your mothers' ironing boards and heading to the sea to try to dodge those hungry sharks. How sweet. Best regards and God save the Queen.
Posted on: 29 June 2006 by David Robert Bell
I don't recall Aussies ever putting shit on poms LOL

Dave
Posted on: 30 June 2006 by Rico
no - they'd (more correctly) be hanging shit off.
Posted on: 01 July 2006 by Stephen
Those were nasty and uncalled for comments Jamie,they were offensive and condescending. Life in the new world is very good.
stephen, auckland, new zealand.
Posted on: 01 July 2006 by Mr Underhill
It is impossible to see any humour in this.

It appears to have been written by a small minded xenophobic pillock.

Martin
Surrey, England
Posted on: 01 July 2006 by Mick P
I have to agree. Rather sad and pathetic.

Regards

Mick
Posted on: 02 July 2006 by JamieWednesday
quote:
Those were nasty and uncalled for comments Jamie,they were offensive and condescending. Life in the new world is very good.


In retrospect, you're right.

Note to self. Never make a post when you've had a few...
Posted on: 02 July 2006 by Mick P
"Note to self. Never make a post when you've had a few..."

Jamie

You have learnt a lesson which is good.

Don't worry about posting when you have had a few, I do it all the time.

Regards

Mick
Posted on: 02 July 2006 by Bob McC
Don't we know...
Posted on: 02 July 2006 by JamieWednesday
Sorry Uncle Mick.
Posted on: 02 July 2006 by Rico
I for one read it with a view of good humour and acerbic sarcastic wit - surely noone here would genuinely proffer such bile with any degree of seriousness - and had a bit of a laugh.

quote:
the real tournament starts now that only the real footballing teams are left.


which can only beg the question - after the weekend's developments, could the teams recently knocked out have ever been considered as meterial for the badge "real footballing team"? Confused
Posted on: 03 July 2006 by Ancipital
I think the performance reminded me more of the Keystone Cops Big Grin
Posted on: 03 July 2006 by Mabelode, King of Swords
quote:
I for one read it with a view of good humour and acerbic sarcastic wit - surely noone here would genuinely proffer such bile with any degree of seriousness - and had a bit of a laugh.


Same here. After all, Aussies have never held back in bagging the Brits - it hasn't exactly been one way traffic!

quote:
could the teams recently knocked out have ever been considered as meterial for the badge "real footballing team"?


Er - does that include Brazil? Big Grin

Steve
Posted on: 03 July 2006 by JamieWednesday
Reply in the same paper today...

Well, Paul Kaynes (Letters, June 28), how is life in the Old Dart today? Just wanted to drop you all a note of condolence on your World Cup exit. Dreadfully sorry about the soccer, old chap, but don't worry, you can always pep yourself up by cheering for the Germans in their next game.

Although we thought you may have been good enough to be there in the first place, we, as one of your foreign outposts, now feel disillusioned with the Empire's potency and, most importantly, that you represented our Queen poorly.

But your previous observation that the real tournament starts now that only the real footballing teams are left appears to have suddenly gained currency in the little colony.

Oh, I note that Sri Lanka gave your chaps a 5-nil hiding overnight in the one-day cricket series. As an Aussie of Sri Lankan heritage I feel an inherent sense of smugness this morning. I'm sure you will understand.

Best regards and God save the Queen (and Sven).

That's just having a pop! The first was, I believe, a well constructed missive deliberately utilising National stereotypes to underline the absurdity of comparison between a Nation's sporting prowess with International bragging rights whetehr Australian or English. Funny in a lighthearted way if you don't take it seriously (although some do and that's fair enough on a public forum) and in hindsight probably wasn't worth posting. But I guess Aussies get the joke...certainly the ones I've spoken to do.