Peter@Cymbiosis
Posted by: jon h on 18 March 2014
(I hope PaulS and Dougy will allow this to stay here, given its the most popular forum hereabouts)
I was contacted early this morning by Peter Swain of Cymbiosis with tragic news. He asked me to post here.
"Jon, I felt I needed to let you know that Jane took her own life on Sunday. She had been suffering with a little depression for the last year and was taking mild medication. She had never shown any signs of self harming and she was surrounded by a close and loving family.
We are devastated. She seemed so good last week when I went to Switzerland for five days work and she went to visit her parents in Salisbury, she sounded fine when I called her there and her parents say that she was good too, if maybe a little quiet.
She left them on Saturday, came home and spoke to my Mum on Sunday morning, in advance of seeing her in the evening for dinner.
When she didn’t turn up or answer the phones, Mum called the Police who called and entered our house, finding Jane dead. By the time I got home from Heathrow, the Police had tidied up the scene in the bedroom and had taken some letters she wrote and other materials, I guess the tablets she used.
They allowed me to spend some time with her cuddling her before her body was taken to Kettering General. I am devastated. Tom and Nikki equally so. They are both being very strong for me.
They are everything to me.
Peter"
Jane, his wife, was from Salisbury and kept her maiden name of Shellabear. Her parents still live in Salisbury and the family have many contacts there.
Our hearts go out to him, his family and staff in this most difficult of times. I know the Naim family will support him as best we can.
Jon
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by Willy
Deepest condolences to you and your loved ones.
Willy.
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by Old Parkland
Dear Peter, So very very terribly sad and so utterly devastated for you and all the family members.
Very much love and comfort in this hopeless time from all us music guys.
Carl.
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by The Hawk
Very sad.
Condolences to Peter and his family.
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by Mick P
This is very sad news indeed.
This is nothing anyone can really say but please accept my condolences.
Mick
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by N16SPS
The posts here are a credit to you. I was sorry to have read about this on the forum, and like others I have not had the pleasure of meeting you. Having a family of my own I can only guess at the grief that you are all experiencing. Best wishes to you and hope you can take strength though your family and the friends that you have around you.
Pete
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by rackkit
Very sad news indeed. Peter is very well thought & though not a customer of his he's given me bits of advise & help via emails over the years. Sincere condolences to Peter & his family at this very difficult time.
Rack
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by Massimo Bertola
I join all these good people in expressing sorrow and disbelief, but I cannot really say much. I'm sorry.
Max
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by toby
Sorry ,to hear such sad sad news.Our thoughts are with you and your family.
Toby
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by joerand
Peter,
We've only ever crossed paths in this virtual world of the forum, but you have my very real, heartfelt condolences.
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by achique99
Shocked and sad when I got this tragic news yesterday.
Condolences to you, Tom and Nikki as well.
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by Nich
Peter, we've spoken through this forum and met at Cymbiosis, but I could not claim to know you or you're family. I have personally faced mental illness and looked into the abyss of suicide, and still could not describe or explain it to others. You will never really understand why Jane did this, but I hope you can take some comfort and strength from the support for you (and your family) on forums like this and no doubt in everyday communications. My heartfelt sympathies to you and all who were close to Jane. I sincerely hope time will bring you some peace.
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by Loki
To you and your family , Peter, our love, peace and grace at this time. We join you in your sorrow and in the fight against the demons.
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by joesilva
Peter,
When we met up for dinner some 2 weeks ago at the nice restaurant Jane had chosen, I never would have thought that it would be the last time that I would see Jane. We may never know what ran through her mind that last day, but I hope you will find some comfort in remembering the wonderful journey through life you two have shared, and the two great kids you have in Tom and Nikki. Also, look how many friends you have that have come out to offer their best wishes and support. Truly a reflection of how you have touched so many people all over the world.
Joe
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by Jay Coleman
Devastating news. My deepest condolences.
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by jon h
Peter has posted this comment to a thread on Facebook. It is equally applicable here so I am cross posting it.
"Thank you everyone I very much appreciate your words. Chris, Jon asked if I'd like something posting publicly after I mailed him and it's the right thing to do. People need to know it's best. Jane, was a lovely person, my partner and then my wife, the loving mother of my children. We have been together 35 years since meeting as students when both studying for our degrees. There is now a huge hole in my life that can never be filled, but its so comforting reading everyone's comments. Peter"
Jon
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by Stoik
How tragic this is.
Have my deepest condolences, and may all your souls find peace.
Regards,
Julie & Marc-André
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by Corry
Peter, I've never met you, I've never even spoken to you, but I feel as though I know you through your limitless generosity on this forum, and elsewhere. I am beyond stunned at this devastating news. My deepest condolences to you and your family.
Colm
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by Mark Dunn
Peter, my sincerest condolences. You're the most helpful person I know, even though I've never had the pleasure to meet you in person. If there's anything we can do for you please let us know, - we are all thinking of you at this sad moment.
Mark Dunn
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by glevethan
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by Felix H
My deepest condolences Peter!
Felix
Posted on: 18 March 2014 by Cymbiosis
To all of you, my sincere thanks for your kind, supportive and comforting words.
Jon thank you, reading all these messages really helps.
Joe, your words are so true. Jane and I had such great times together, we never argued, we just loved each other so much. We love our children we are all extremely close as a family and this will help us all in going forward.
Yesterday, the Police provided me with a copy of the letter she wrote to me and the kids telling us of her love, her admiration for us all in what we had achieved and her hopes for our future. This helps me, but why do this dreadful thing.... Nobody, myself, the family, the local health professionals or friends had any idea about the depth of her thoughts, she hid her darkest thoughts well, and for a considerable time I now know.
She knew the heartbreak her passing would cause but urged us to be brave, remember her how she was, and work hard for ourselves and for others in the future and to take good care of our aged parents.
Depression, is a terrible, terrible thing and I urge anyone who has concerns for themselves or for another, get help, don't let it build, it can be managed. I know many people who have come through it and out the other side, it need not end this way.
Peter
Posted on: 19 March 2014 by bluedog
I'm so sorry for the tragic loss for you and your family; my deepest condolences, Peter.
Paul
Posted on: 19 March 2014 by Keith
What a devastating loss to such a good helpful man. We have lost two former colleagues and personal friends similarly in last few months. All who have contact with Peter must support intensively over next few months.The dreadful circumstances mustn't diminish the love past and present.Let us care for each other.
Peter there is a lot of support for you and our thoughts are with you.
Keith
Posted on: 19 March 2014 by Rui Marques
Peter,
I have never met you, but like many others appreciate your contributions in this forum.
My thoughts and feelings are with you and your family right now.
That you take the time to give advice here about the dangers of depression speaks a lot about you and your strength to move on.
My deepest condolences.
Rui
Posted on: 19 March 2014 by Bart
Peter, I offer you my condolences and empathy from across the pond. I hope that you can continue to find the strength that you've shown here with your words.
Thinking of you, as are so many,
Bart
